Think back to your last biology class—assuming you weren’t too busy doodling in the margins or wondering what mitochondria ever did for you. Remember chromosomes? Humans have twenty-three pairs. The 23rd determines sex, but nestled somewhere in the other 22, I strongly suspect—based on zero scientific research and 100% personal observation—that there’s a common sense gene.

We all supposedly have this gene. It’s standard issue—like belly buttons and bad decisions. But for some people? It’s… underdeveloped. Like a houseplant that’s never seen sunlight, water, or the faintest will to live, their common sense gene just… never stood a chance. That gene never bloomed, never activated, maybe even mistook itself for a rock and went dormant.

You’ve seen them in the wild. They’re the ones trying to push a pull door. You’ve worked next to them. You’ve maybe even married into their family. You look at them and think, “Wow. So this is what happens when evolution takes a coffee break.”

But hey, don’t judge too harshly. It’s not really their fault. Their common sense gene probably missed roll call the day logic was handed out and has been winging it ever since.